Right now I can't help but stress over timing and details. Will I know when my water breaks? How long should I really labor at home? What if I get there too late and can't get an epidural? Can I handle a natural birth? How far along should I be before getting an epidural? What if my pregnancy stops progressing after I get one? What if it doesn't work for me? What if Parker freaks out and I have to have a c-section? Is Parker going to be too loopy to breast feed right away? Will I be able to even do it? Are they really going to put him on me all gooey and bloody for an hour? (note: I'm SOO not a bodily fluids person!) Does the 48 hrs in the hospital covered by insurance start when I walk through the door or after the baby is born? How soon should I let people come in the room after delivery? What if I'm not up for visitors and just want time with Drew and Parker? Will I have time to change and 'freshen up' before people come in? Will I go into labor before my mom gets to Arizona?
Oh goodness. I realize I pretty much can't control any of this. I just don't know what to expect. Well, I do. We went over it in our childbirth class. All the "if this happens then..." "if this doesn't happen then you'll have to...." stuff like that. But still. This is crazy stuff! I'm trying really really hard to not stress, but I can't help it. Not to mention everything that will happen after.
I'm not so much in the nesting phase as far as getting the house ready cause the baby is coming. Its more.. my moms coming! I can't look like a slob! I really don't want her cleaning my shower! I'm not good at people doing things for me that I should be perfectly fine doing myself. But I don't know how I'll feel afterwards. Am I gunna be stuck on the couch for 2 weeks in my nightgown and not be able to get up and around? Not to mention have people over! Oh goodness. Then there's getting the house ready to move! packing and cleaning, packing and cleaning! I'm just not ready for this all to happen. I'm sure it will pass in a blur! Luckily, I will have my mom here, even if I don't want her cleaning my nasty shower, which I'm sure she would do.
I'm just in a worrying stage. Was the a contraction? Is Parker moving less? Is there something wrong? Should I call the doctor? My left ankle is massive, way better than my right, is something wrong? Should I call the doctor? No, I can wait until monday. I'm starting to get a headache, is it preeclampsia? Stupid stuff like that. I know its not. I'm just freaking over nothing.
am I really ready?
The fact that you are worrying means you are a mom!! It never goes away. And yes, once things happen you will be ready. Crazy stuff can happen during labor but once its over its no big deal. (Remember me not being able to walk?! Forgotten.) No matter how he gets here, he will get here!! You are going to be a fantastic mother. And as far as your water breaking, you will know! It feels like you keep peeing your pants every time you stand up or walk around. Ha ha. But don't freak out, just take a breath and enjoy every moment! Even the ones when they place your sweet baby on you all messy. I promise it won't matter how messy he is. You will want to hold him and love him!!! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteYou poor thing!! I'm sorry you're stressing so much. I haven't given birth yet so I guess I don't know exactly what it's going to be like but I have no doubt that in a months time you're going to look back at this post and think, "silly me. I was worrying over nothing". You will have Drew, the nurses and your doctor to help you step by step through everything. They will let your know when it's time to do something or if it's your last chance to get an epidural. Just remember that you, your loving husband and your baby boy are going to leave the hospital alive and well and in the long run that's really all that matters, right?
ReplyDeleteHowever, as far as your mom goes, I don't think there is really much I can say to make you feel better. haha. Mom's will be Mom's because they, I meant we, love our children too much and want to do everything we can for them when a helping hand is needed.
You are too cute, Niki! I'm sure Parker's big day will be perfect. Prest and I will keep you guys in our prayers. We miss you!!
Oh my goodness! Just reading this post is overwhelming! Since I'm not a mom and can't give you comfort or whatever, I'm just gonna tell ya I'm freaked out right beside you! Having a kid is scary! But I know you can do it! I get freaked out and tell myself I'm just going to adopt then I have to remember people have been having babies for years and years and we're still around! And multiple babies, so it can't be THAT bad right?! If I can do anything for you let me know! I'm good at packing or bringing you lunch or cleaning showers!
ReplyDeleteYou look cute pregnant and I really like the name Parker. All the unknown is hard, but try not to worry, it will all work out. I was disappointed with the way my delivery went, but then I had Eli in my arms and it didn't really matter anymore.
ReplyDeleteI remember being totally freaked out too, and I had a lot of the same questions you have right now. Although I can't answer them all, I can tell you that I know it will all work out. Seriously, not one single thing about Jaden's birth went as planned. NOT ONE! At one point I finally realized, "ya know, Heavenly Father is always there for me, and he has never ceased to bless my life! He always takes care of me.". I promise Heavenly is lookin out for you too, and when you need it most He (or one of his sweet angels -like drew, your mom, or a nurse) WILL be there to comfort and take care of you!! As far as the childbirth classes go..they over dramatize! It is not going to be so bad! And your 48 hour stay begins after Parker is born! Call me if you get too freaked out! Love ya girl!
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